Celebrating LGBTI+ pride with the cast of Kinky Boots: Mark Stefanoff

Over the coming weeks, AussieTheatre will be working with the cast of Kinky Boots to bring our readers a series of features that will celebrate living as a rainbow person in the Australian theatre community.

Mark Stefanoff, a gay actor who plays an Angel in Kinky Boots (his professional music theatre debut), took some time to answer our questions and spoke to us about his journey to self-acceptance, why Australia deserves marriage equality, and the ability of Kinky Boots to change minds.

 

With which aspect of the queer community do you identify?

Gay.

What is your role (onstage or backstage) in Kinky Boots?

Referee Angel/ Ensemble.

What are your pronouns?

Within the show, her, she, and FABULOUS!

Could you please outline your “Pride” story?

I was raised in quite a religious family, never really understanding the LGBTI community ‘til I was around 12. I always knew that I viewed life very differently, as I was viewed by the world differently, but I never knew the answer.

I found myself gravitating towards girls, because I was able to talk openly with them, and we shared similar interests, but then I realised I was attracted to men. This was a strange concept for an oppressed “bisexual” Lutheran school boy to realise, but the moment I did, life started to take a turn.

I never came out at this time, but I was starting to dress differently, which had people talking. One day during my high school years, I was called up during assembly to give a talk about the music faculty when a smart-arsed kid decided to yell out “YOU’RE GAY!” I had two choices there and then. I could accept that I would take comments like this, but instead I chose to say “Yeah, I am gay. And that’s okay!” From that day on, I was never harassed or bullied for being gay. It changed my confidence and it was never a big deal ever again!

Why do you believe so many people in the LGBTI+ community gravitate towards working in the theatre industry?

I feel we are very in tune with our emotions, and are very quick to include and encourage everyone. Sexuality was never really a question, or a topic of conversation when I started out. I found I was surrounded by people with similar interests who didn’t care at all what happened behind closed doors, but who I was and what I had to offer as a performer!

Do you believe that the theatre community is more accepting of sexuality and gender diversity than other workforces?

I would like to say that it is equal, but I feel we have embraced diversity more so than other workforces. We have definitely made progress and there is more acceptance, although we are not there yet. The theatre community is much more accepting than any other place I have been a part of.

Has there been a time in your life where you felt as though participating in theatre helped you to make sense of your gender or sexuality?

When I first saw RENT […] it helped me see acceptance on stage. I later went on to do the show when I was around 21 and [it changed] the way I viewed myself and learned about myself within this community. I think the themes of the show led me to explore emotions I may not have ever been exposed to, but the way it helped me develop a new confidence in my sexuality and within the LGBTI+ community was something new and exciting.

Have you ever seen yourself or aspects of yourself portrayed in a character in a musical/play?

I don’t think I have related to a character completely, but I have been able to relate to a lot of aspects of characters! Especially characters from bare: A Pop Opera.

Do you believe Kinky Boots represents LGBTI+ issues well for a modern audience?

100%! It speaks to an audience on the glamorous side, but also tells the heartache, loneliness and the struggle that someone may face. It tells a story of real friendship, love, and the journey to acceptance, one that not everyone gets too see… But more than anything it leaves you with hope, and that is something that everyone can identify with.

What inspiration do you take from Kinky Boots about your own queer identity? Have you learned anything from the characters in the show

When I first heard the song, ‘Not My Father’s Son’ it brought me to tears. I have an incredible father (who I love), but we never saw eye to eye growing up, especially with sexuality and with my career. Hearing the words “I’m not my father’s son, I’m not the image of what he dreamed of,” broke my heart.

And the moment the words left Lola’s lips saying “I could just be me”, [they] pulled me into such an emotional spiral as it was reassurance that yes! we are different, but what I think, and how I am as a person is what matters. My dad loves and accepts every aspect of me and what I do, but that song is something that I feel many young gay men may have felt, and to watch someone else go through that on stage in such a venerable way is incredibly moving. (Especially Callum [Francis, who headlines the Australian production as Lola]’s portrayal, it is truly a breath taking moment.)

Do you believe that Kinky Boots has the power to influence audience members when it comes to issues of gender or sexuality?

It educates but informs in a non-offensive way, allowing all audience members to really think about how they may view the community!

What message do you hope questioning audience members will take away from Kinky Boots?

To literally just be who you want to be. Accept everything about yourself and accept others. We are all put on this earth for a short amount of time and we need to really embrace each other, as we can make this earth a happy place.

Do you have a favourite of the six steps in the six step program at the end of your show?

Learn something new. That is really something! Think about it: learn something new. We can learn from everyone something we may not agree with or like, but we can take a step forward learning from them.

Why is Kinky Boots important to you?

This show allows me to be something extremely fun and different, I don’t spend every day in lashes and heels, so it’s a great challenge but allows me to explore a new character that will hopefully reach out to an audience.

This show has such heart to it. I will be honest that before I saw the show back in New York in 2013, I thought it would be a naff show about drag queens and sequins, but boy was I wrong! I think for me it allows me to really think about how we view other people, whilst at the same time have a ball with an incredible cast and crew.

America was going through the gay marriage battle when Kinky Boots premiered on Broadway, and now the show is premiering in Australia while the same issue is in the spotlight. Do you have any advice for theatre people who might be struggling at the moment, or even those who are opposed to same-sex marriage?

Gay marriage has always been a hot topic somewhere in the world over the past 10 years. I am engaged to an amazing man, and now more than ever I have realised the impact of not having the same rights as a heterosexual couple. To those who are struggling in this time, remember, we may have just one voice, but together we can be heard. We must stick together in these times and support each other.
To those who are struggling with [the concept of] gay marriage, I ask a question: think of the happiest day of your life. It may be your first date, first kiss, first love, a proposal or even marriage, leading to the greatest gift of a child. Take a moment to think how it would change your life if you never had this happy moment. What happens behind a closed door does not dictate anyone’s future, nor who or how they should love. We simply want to be able to string together memories like you, from that first kiss to walking down the aisle. We want it recognised that we too deserve the same rights, to be recognised that our love is as just as important as anyone else’s.

Cyndi Lauper, Harvey Fierstein, and Jerry Mitchell [the creative team] all stand out as queer icons in pop culture or the theatre world. What has it been to like to work with the material they created? Did you admire any celebrity that was linked with the LGBTI+ world growing up?

The material for this show is truly incredible. Not only will it make the hairs on your neck stand up in absolute awe of the musical numbers, but it will make you leave thinking about the beautiful journey between two unlikely friends. Cyndi has really paved the way for so many artists, but also for the LGBTI+ community. She has left her mark on the world, spreading her word of acceptance. This show will help those young ones struggling with sexuality, show the reality of what can happen, but more importantly, show them acceptance.

Does Kinky Boots have the power to change minds?

YES! A thousand times, yes! Come in with an open mind, even if you are supportive of the LGBTI community. Open your mind and allow us to take you on a journey that will make you feel something so special… It will make you think, and you will be overwhelmed with emotions. It is never too late to change your mind, and this show will prove that to you!

Kinky Boots begins previews this evening in Melbourne, with tickets available at this link. AussieTheatre wished them the all the best for a fantastic season.